Wordless Wednesday

Memoirs By Single Moms: Jane Devin's 'Elephant Girl'

Copyright: Jane Devin

As a writer and a single mother it is extremely important to me that I share books written by other single moms with this community.  To be honest, I want to like them all because of my desire to support the single parent community, but some books stand apart more so than others, though, not because they were written by a single mom but because the author is such a talented wordsmith that your ability to put their book down is severely compromised.  Jane Devin's Elephant Girl is one of those books.

Elephant Girl was so emotionally engaging for me that I found it hard to separate myself from it once I had finished it.  Elephant Girl made me wince in pain and made me put it down so that I could catch my breath.  I found myself wanting to reach into the book, into the author's past, to bring the child and the teenager into my home, to love and shield her, to protect her from what was inevitable for her.  This book made me nod in understanding, cringe in disgust at the cruelty that is possible in this world, and smile with gratitude when small but fortunate things befell her.  Mostly?  This book made me feel.  It pulled me into the author's world in a way that felt both jarring and comfortable.  When I was finished with the book I felt a profound sadness that it was done, that my connection to this story was now over.  It took me a day or two to stop wanting to read it again; I wanted to be in her world (regardless of how very painful it was at times), I wanted her words inside my head, I wanted to share her experiences with her as if my presence as a reader would somehow make her less alone, and really, that is the highest compliment I could ever pay an author.  I wanted to be there with her, and all because of the grace with which she shared her story. 

You would think that as emotionally painful as some of the parts of Elephant Girl were that it would've been a difficult read; on the contrary, it was such an easy, quick read that it felt like it went by entirely too fast.  It is a testament to the author's facility with words that while the story was painful at times, her delivery was one that always gave you hope and made you believe that the dreams that carried her would one day see her through.  True brilliance.

To purchase it in both paperback and Kindle versions click here.  To purchase other eReader versions (iBooks, Nook, etc.) click here.

Plum District - THE Deal Site For Moms

There's a great new group-buying deal site called Plum District that is for moms, by moms.  I will be sharing some of the deals that I purchase from them with you because sometimes as single moms it gets really challenging to afford the "extras" in life.  Plum District  is a great way to afford things for you, for the kids, and events that your whole family will love.  Today I got a great deal on Holiday Cards, which you can check out here:  http://www.plumdistrict.com/three_for_free/be07e16d19/click.

Keep your eyes peeled for more Plum District deals here, or just join their site and get them sent directly to your inbox!


*Plum District and I have partnered to bring my readers "insider information" on deals that would be relevant to the community.  I am compensated for this in "Plum Dollars", which I then use to purchase Plum District deals myself.

Wordless Wednesday

Wordless Wednesday

Redefining Mondays

Ronny Beliën / Stock Xchng

I know that Mondays, for the most part, can be a huge drag.  You've only just had 2 very quick days with your children, and now here you are, at work again - for 5 long days.  Even if you love your job, the toll it can take on your mental energy to be fully present can be difficult, especially if you've just come from a weekend of fun, relaxation, and family togetherness.  Mondays have historically been the most difficult days of the week, and there are probably as many reasons for that as there are grains of sand.  I invite you, however, to redefine your Mondays.

What do I mean by that?  New beginnings can be exciting, and can bring the kind of change in one's life that will get one out of the rut that they may currently be in.  Every week, we get a new beginning of sorts, and that new beginning is called Monday.  Every Monday we get to make a choice: we can lament the fact that we are going to the same old job, working the same long hours, doing the same old work, or we can look to Mondays as a way in which to re-invigorate our energy so that we can bring something fresh and new to our lives.  Is there a new class that you have been wanting to take, but keep putting off?  A form of volunteerism that you've been meaning to take on but never seem to find the time for because you are too distracted?  A craft or other project that you've wanted to start with the kids that keeps slipping your mind?  Use Mondays to implement these changes!  Use Mondays to re-commit to living your life on purpose, in ways that feel most positive and impactful to you.  You'd be surprised what you can accomplish if you use your energy to find the good in your life, or to find ways in which you can bring good to others, and Mondays are a great way to implement these things.

Redefine Mondays, and you redefine yourself in some ways.  Redefine yourself and you can redefine your life.  With a new perspective, it is possible to bring a lightening bolt of energy to your week.  Take small but measurable steps, and before you know it you will be grateful that Monday is here, bringing with it an entire new week to bring bright and beautiful changes to your lives and the lives of your children!

It's Starting To Feel Good In Here

Lotus Head / Stock Xchng

Right before I started my fitness journey with Lucille Roberts I can honestly say that I had given up on myself.  I would look into the mirror at the very overweight woman I had become and I would get really sad, yes, but not so much that I wanted to do anything about it.  Or, perhaps, the deep sadness I felt at having let myself go to the extent that I had was what kept me in a place of hopelessness for so long.  Either way, I had fully resigned myself to being the size that I was, to being as unfit as I was, to being as unhappy as I was with what I saw in my mirror.

Now, don't get me wrong, I fully celebrate beauty in all of its forms and sizes, and have no problem recognizing the beauty in a woman who does not fit the mold of what society tells us is an acceptable body type.  I just knew that I wasn't at my personal best.  I didn't want to be skinny, and I still don't, but what I was tired of being was tired.  Sluggish.  Weak.  I had given up, though, and was looking at a life that would mimic my beloved Grandmother's: one of obesity-related illnesses that could have been avoided had she known what I knew.  During her time, the more meat you had on your bones the more womanly you were, and she didn't know a thing about BMI, metabolic rates, or any of the other things we now know about.  As she exited middle age and entered into her senior citizen years, years of eating foods that "put meat on her bones" now made her dangerously obese with the slowing down of her metabolism.  She didn't know any better, but that was the thing: I did.  And yet, I had given up.  Too tired to fight what my body had turned into, I had just given up.  It was a sad, painful place to be.

Today, almost 3 months after beginning my training at Lucille Roberts, I feel like such a different woman than who I was then.  When I got weighed in today I was down to 159 pounds, which is a pound and a half lost from last week.  Today marks the first time that I am in the 150s in about a year!  The difference about this weight loss than the other times in my life that I've lost weight is that unlike in the past where I've just put myself on a diet, got thinner, but did no exercise - this time I am fit.  I am getting toned, I am getting tighter, and I am getting strong.  My body looks better now at 159 than it ever did at 145, when that 145 was achieved through starvation diets.  I am beginning to look as strong as I feel, and I have to say, it's starting to feel good in here, in this skin of mine.  I know for a fact that working out with a trainer has made all the difference in the world, and finding the right trainer for me has made me look forward to seeing what I can push my body to do next.  I never thought I'd write those last words - ever.  Yet, feeling ever stronger, learning how to gently push myself in increments small enough that I can handle, I have acquired a tenacity that makes me feel physically powerful.  That is a space that is entirely new for me.  This process has been as much about growing stronger mentally than it has been about getting physically strong, and I am ever so grateful for it.

So, what's next for me?  Who knows.  With a strong body and newly-found determination, though?  Anything is possible.

Wordless Wednesday